


Unfinished Conversations

by theprydonian_archivist



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Character Study, Episode: s03e12 The Sound of Drums, Episode: s03e13 Last of the Time Lords, M/M, Year That Never Was
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-03
Updated: 2008-03-03
Packaged: 2018-07-15 01:01:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7199048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theprydonian_archivist/pseuds/theprydonian_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five conversations Theta and Koschei never finished, and one that's just beginning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unfinished Conversations

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Versaphile, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Prydonian](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Prydonian). Deciding that it needed to have a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact the e-mail address on [The Prydonian collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/theprydonian/profile).

A couple of months after the Master died in his arms, the Doctor realized that he'd been listening for him ever since. Well, not listening, but feeling. Trying to sense him out there somewhere. Mostly it was just painfully quiet, but sometimes…there was just a flicker of something. Most likely nothing but random fluctuations in his blood pressure or something, but it was enough to keep him listening. Listening and remembering days when the Time War was just another thing for him to argue about with someone who was still his friend. In the days before things got complicated.

*****

Koschei burst into Theta's room one night cursing Borusa, the drums, and Time Lord society in general; this wasn't terribly unusual, but the level of fury was. Theta waited for him to wind down a bit, setting aside the notes he hadn't really been studying anyway, and asked, eventually, "What brought this on?"

The question stopped Koschei cold where he'd been pacing in the narrow space between the desk and the bed where Theta was sitting, and at first it looked as though he wasn't going to answer. Then, after a moment, he pulled the desk chair out and sat down on it backward, folding his arms across the back of it. He took a couple of deep breaths, and then said, "They could've stopped the drums, Thete. When we were kids. Well, maybe. No guarantee, I guess. But they didn't try, not properly."

"That doesn't make sense." 

"I know! Or it _didn't_ , until I met with Borusa today. He thinks there's a war coming. A huge one. And he thinks one of us might be able to stop it."

"He said that?"

"Not…exactly."

"Koschei."

Koschei rubbed his forehead. "I saw it. In his mind, when we were discussing what classes I should take next term. I wasn’t trying to. I just…" he trailed off. "They're using both of us. To save themselves, because they can't bring themselves to _interfere_ and they think we will."

Theta frowned. "Who are we supposed to have this war against?" 

"I don't know. I didn't get more than a glimpse; Borusa got his shields up too fast. And then of course he wouldn't answer me when I started asking about it."

"If there's a war coming, wouldn't we know about it? Wouldn't people be getting ready for it?"

"It'll be centuries from now. But in our lifetimes, obviously." Koschei was tapping his fingers idly on the back of the chair as he talked. 

"Show me."

"What?"

"Show me what you saw." 

Koschei stared at him. "You're not serious."

"I am." At Koschei's skeptical look, he declared, "I need to know what I'm getting into here. It's as much my future as yours, right? If Borusa's seen my future, I want to see it too."

Still looking undecided and a little hesitant, Koschei stood and moved over to where Theta was sitting on the bed with his back to the wall. He knelt on the bed and raised a hand to Theta's face, pausing before actually touching him to say, "You're sure?"

"I'm sure."

Koschei studied him intently for a moment then nodded, apparently satisfied with what he saw, and rested his fingers lightly against Theta's temples. 

_Fear and flashes of battle, guilt and hope somehow tied to him and Koschei, the end of the Time Lords as a species, Time Lords gone from space and time like they never existed, Gallifrey burning. Dread and exhaustion, determination and horror._

Theta reflexively pushed Koschei's hand away, breaking the connection between them. He blinked rapidly, and shook his head to clear it. "Borusa thinks we can stop _that?_ "

"He hopes we can. He hasn't been able to figure out how."

"And you got that in, what? A couple of _seconds?_ "

Koschei nodded. "Then, of course, he wouldn't tell me anything. Didn't yell at me for it, though. I'm not sure if that means he wanted me to see it or just that he realizes that I saw it by accident. There was more to it, but it's even less coherent than that. A lot of screaming. Time folding back on itself. And the part about the drums. Deciding not to try to stop them, because they'll drive me…drive me to battle somehow." 

He dropped down next to Theta, leaned against the wall beside him. "They're getting louder. They're almost as loud as they were when they first started. How am I supposed to _think?_ How am I supposed to do anything?"

"If it's true that he's using you, or even if you just believe that," Theta went on quickly, ignoring Koschei's growl, "of course they're going to be loud right now. They're always louder when you're upset."

Koschei slammed his fists into the bed. "You don't believe it. You _felt_ it, and you don't believe it."

Theta sighed. "I don't know what to believe."

"It's easier to just think I'm crazy." Koschei rounded on Theta, fiercely. "That's it, isn't it? You think it's all in my head!"

"I said I don't know. Why hasn’t anybody said anything, if they know a war's coming?"

"I don't think everybody knows. I think they're trying to find ways to stop it without panicking everybody." 

"It felt real, I grant you that." 

"Yeah. Borusa's scared." Koschei slid down the wall a little, crossed his arms across his chest. "I don't know what they expect us to do."

"Have to find us first." 

Koschei turned to him and a slow grin spread over his face. "Can't wait to get off this rock." 

"Me either." Theta found himself grinning back; he never could resist that particular expression, all bright-eyed mischief and limitless possibility. 

He wasn't sure which of them reached out first, but they were only inches apart on the bed anyway, and it hardly mattered. Koschei's hand was in his hair, his own on the back of Koschei's neck, and their teeth clashed briefly before they found the right angle. Koschei kissed like he did everything he enjoyed—with enthusiasm and total concentration. 

He pushed Theta down onto the bed and licked under his jaw, whispering in his ear, "The universe won't know what hit it." Koschei's hands slid down and he took hold of Theta's arms, pinning him down. 

Theta moaned and arched against him, muttering, "Not fair, let me go so I can _touch,"_ and Koschei laughed, but didn't let go. 

"Not yet." He bit Theta's shoulder, and Theta decided that it was time to take advantage of the extra leverage his height gave him by rolling them both over and ending up on top of Koshei. 

"Ah, that's better." He grinned down at Koschei. "Much better." 

Koschei narrowed his eyes and said, "Oh, you just _wait,_ " but evidently he decided that he could wait at getting the upper hand, as he just started unbuttoning Theta's shirt, kissing him fiercely in the process. 

*****

Almost a month passed without incident, and then one day Theta walked into his room and stopped short. There were books, papers, and _bits_ of books and papers all over the floor and his bed, and _ouch,_ his Temporal Engineering experiment was never going to be the same again, assuming he could even find all the pieces. Standing in the middle of the mess was Koschei, breathing hard, his clothes and hair in disarray almost as much as the room. Theta stepped toward his friend, and Koschei snarled, "It's under control."

"I can see that." Theta managed dryly, but he stopped when Koschei held up his hand.

"Stay away from me."

Theta thought about pointing out that Koschei was in _his_ room, after all, but decided against it. He raised an eyebrow. "It's just that the entropy in this room has increased a bit since I was in here last."

"Do you _want_ me to strangle you?" Koschei folded his arms tightly across his chest, which almost managed to hide the fact that he was shaking. 

Theta spread his hands. "I want you to let me help you." 

"I don't need your _help._ " 

"Have you eaten today? And when did you last sleep? You look like you've forgotten how." 

"If you don’t _shut up_ \--"

Theta shrugged, stepped carefully across the room, righted his desk chair, and sat down, keeping his movements calm and deliberate.

Koschei's breathing was slowing down now, and he seemed steadier. He shoved books and papers off Theta's bed, and sat down on it. Theta could see his profile, the tightness of his jaw and something wild still in his eyes. 

After a long moment, Koschei took a deep breath, shut his eyes, and asked, "You really don't hear them? You've really never heard them?" He opened his eyes and looked searchingly at Theta. 

"No. Really, never. What set them off this time?"

"There's no _setting them off,_ " Koschei said contemptuously. "They're always there."

"What made them worse, then?" Theta asked patiently.

Koschei moved back on the bed, drawing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around his legs. "I don't know." 

"You didn't get mad at anyone? No one upset you?"

"I said I don't know!"

"I heard you. I'm just trying to think. Must've been something."

"I'm telling you, _nothing._ Out of nowhere, walking back from class." Koschei swallowed hard and looked away. Studying the door far more intently than it deserved, he said, "They've never been that loud before. They've been –loud-- for…weeks now, but they've never been like they were today." The tension in his shoulders looked ferocious. 

"I'll come with you to tell Borusa, if you like," Theta said gently.

"Oh, no, I'm not telling _him._ And don't you go telling him, either." Koschei glared at him. "Promise me that."

"You need to tell somebody. So they can help you."

"Help me _how?_ What do you expect them to do?" 

"There's got to be something—"

"There's something, all right. They'll lock me up, Thete. Drums. In my _head._ " 

"That you've had since we were eight. They know that already. Borusa helped you before. If you're right, he's got to help you."

"I don't know if he can. None of the things he taught me when we were kids did any good today." He grinned suddenly, predatory and with far too many _teeth._ "Trashing your room helped, though."

Theta rolled his eyes. "I'm glad my books gave their lives for a worthy cause." He was proud that his tone came out dismissive rather than worried. It worked, too, because he was rewarded with an entirely different grin. Almost affectionate, a little exasperated.

"You could yell at me, you know. I smashed your experiment." 

"Still be smashed. It's the books I'm more worried about. _You're_ going to have to tell the Archivist what happened to _those,_ my friend."

"Not on an empty stomach. I'm starving. Gonna go and find some food." Koschei got up off the bed, stepped carefully over a pile of papers. "You coming?"

"See? I knew you hadn't eaten today."

"Shut up." But it was almost fond.

****

After days of being increasingly standoffish and distracted in class, followed by a weekend where Theta hadn't seen him at all, Koschei missed Transdimensional Physics, which wasn't terribly unusual, and Temporal Engineering, which was. Theta gave up telling himself he wasn’t the least bit worried, and went looking for him.

He found Koschei in his room, after a bit of pounding at his door and a touch of completely justified jiggery-pokery with the locking mechanism. Koschei was curled up on the bed with his fists pressed to his temples and his eyes tightly shut. He didn’t react as Theta approached. Theta knelt beside the bed, calling his name. He reached out, took hold of Koschei's shoulder and shook him gently.

"Go away," Koschei muttered, curling up tighter. His shirt was sticking to him and his hair was damp with sweat.

"No. Look at me." Theta shook him again. "Come on, look at me. Open your eyes." 

Koschei opened his eyes, finally, his pupils wide and his gaze unfocused. "Just leave me alone, Thete."

"All under control, I know," he said gently, rubbing circles on Koschei's back.

"Don't patronize—" Koschei began, but broke off, wincing and biting his lip. "I can't hear myself _think._ " 

Theta took him by the wrist. "How do you feel about walking? Because you're going to the infirmary. The only option is how." 

Koschei tried to pull away. "I am _not._ "

"Oh, yes, you are. On your feet or dragged kicking and screaming, but you are."

" _No._ "

"Kicking and screaming it is, then." 

Theta made as if to drag him off the bed, and Koschei struggled and said, "Wait. Stop it. Wait, I'll walk." 

"Thought you'd see reason."

Koschei grumbled but pushed himself up off the bed. Once he was on his feet, though, his knees threatened to buckle and he had to grab Theta for support. Theta pulled Koschei's arm over his shoulder and put his arm around his waist.

"I hate you so much right now."

"Yeah, I know." 

****

A few days later, Koschei was back in class, a little pale but otherwise seemingly unaffected. He made up the work he'd missed maddeningly easily, finished his Temporal Engineering project before anyone else, and avoided Theta like the Aldebaran plague. 

Theta finally cornered him outside the library, where Koschei had somehow managed to convince the Archivist he was trustworthy with real books again. 

"I'm _fine,_ " he said, in response to Theta's questions. "And if you're waiting for me to thank you, that's not going to happen."

"No," Theta said gently, "I'm not."

Koschei looked away, bit his lip. "I ought to be able to handle it, Thete, without needing that old fraud's help to do it," he muttered. He pushed past, setting off down the hall, but not so fast that his friend couldn't keep up. "Whether you believe it or not, he's using us. Both of us. Because he thinks we can win his Time War."

The war business again. "If he can help you, then use _him,_ " Theta declared.

Koschei glanced at him as they walked, grinning a little now. "There's hope for you yet."

"I like to think so."

"You're not going to argue with old Garos in Ethics today, are you? Because he'll keep us after class and I've got things I'd really rather be doing."

Theta sighed. "You hate that noninterference thing as much as I do. They just need to see—" 

"They're not going to see anything. Might as well try to argue with gravity." 

"I can't just sit there and let him go on about our duty as Time Lords to do _nothing."_

Koschei groaned. "We'll be there all day if you get him started. Have some consideration, Thete."

"I can't help it! I always intend to sit there and let him go on, but I just can't." 

"It doesn't matter what they think. At all. We'll do what we like anyway, as soon as we're Time Lords, and the less they interfere with us, the better."

Theta waved his hands, hopelessly. "It's wrong. I mean, what use is everything we know if we don't use it?"

"We will, don't worry about that. But in the meantime, you need to pass Ethics. Can't be a Time Lord if you can't list all the things we're not allowed to do." He rolled his eyes, and then gave Theta that grin he never could resist. "Think of it as a to-do list."

Theta laughed as they arrived at the classroom door. "I'll try to get you out of here on time today. No promises after that."

"It's a start."

****

"You were right, all those years ago. What you saw in Borusa's mind," the Doctor said. It was 4 a.m. on the _Valiant,_ and the Master had sent the guards away. They sat not far from the Doctor's makeshift tent. The Doctor had been trying (and failing) not to remember the days when sitting together like this had been as natural as breathing, and when he'd first heard of the Time War, long before he actually believed it would happen.

"Funny, it's not nearly as satisfying to hear you say that as I thought it would be. Maybe because it's _blindingly obvious_ at this point." The Master was quiet for a moment, and then said wryly, "We showed them, though, didn't we? Didn't exactly work out the way he hoped."

"No. No it didn't."

"You never did tell me. Is there a planet there at all now? Or is it just rocks and dust?"

The Doctor looked away. "It's gone," he said.

"What did you _do?_ That's pretty impressive, Gallifrey gone like it never existed. Rassilon never born."

"Wasn't my idea."

"They would never have let me anywhere near a weapon like that, of course. I'd have been all too happy to use it. Didn't know you had it in you. Oh, that's a lie. I always knew you had it in you."

"There wasn't time to think about it. Thought it'd kill me, too, but it didn't. Well, it did, but…"

"But you regenerated. That must've been fun. The last of the Time Lords, and for how long?" He looked at the Doctor expectantly.

"A little over two years."

The Master smirked. "Don't give me that. You know it down to the minute."

"Yeah, I suppose I do." 

"So how long?"

"Too long." The Doctor took a deep breath. "Look, we both know the paradox machine won't hold forever. Dismantle it now, and let's just go. Wherever you like." 

"Don't start that again. I like it here. Never really saw the appeal of the place before."

"What are you accomplishing here? Not building a Time Lord empire, not with everything hinging on the abomination you've made out of my TARDIS." 

"She's made it this far. She'll do until I get the materials to make something more permanent."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because I can. Who's going to stop me? They're all dead. Thanks for that, by the way." 

"You can't hold the Earth forever. Humans are more resourceful than you think."

"Not forever, no, probably not. Don't have the patience for forever, anyway. I'll get bored with your favorite planet eventually. Not yet, though. I'm having too much fun to stop now." 

The grin he turned on the Doctor had nothing of Koschei in it, and that was a relief. Almost entirely a relief. The Doctor closed his eyes. "Do you remember--" he said, and the Master bounced to his feet. 

"Enough of this. Busy day tomorrow. Today. Whatever. Sleep tight, gramps." He turned on his heel and left the bridge, leaving the Doctor to his memories.

*****

He'd been so sure that the Master wouldn't let himself die. He would have bet his own remaining regenerations on it. He'd been wrong. If he'd seen Lucy, if he'd given the gun to Jack, if…Might as well go back to if Yana'd never opened that watch, for all the good it did. And what had he been thinking, anyway, that he could keep the Master with him? That would have worked for all of ten minutes, if he'd kept him handcuffed for seven of them. 

Still, once he'd gotten some distance, some perspective, it seemed a bit fishy. The Master always had a plan to save himself. Always. Even if he had to steal bodies and keep himself going by sheer force of will. And there was Lazarus Labs; who knew what they'd been up to? It was no wonder, then, that the Doctor found himself listening for him from time to time, trying to sense him out there somewhere. 

Almost eight months after the Master died in his arms, the Doctor was just finishing up repairs on the engines of a damaged refugee ship when he suddenly sat bolt upright. He picked up his sonic screwdriver from where he'd dropped it, and his hands weren't entirely steady as he put the last bolts back and activated the engines. He barely heard the thanks of the crew and passengers as he made his way to the TARDIS. Once inside, he shut his eyes for a moment, and fished his psychic paper out of his pocket. There, spelled out with an undertone of amusement in the familiar circles and whorls were the words, _"The clock is ticking, Doctor."_


End file.
